DisGraceFul

   At work yesterday, as I was slipping out of my chair to go to lunch, I hit my hip on a corner of my desk. When I bent over to check out the damage, I hit my head on - brace yourself - the plastic straw of the tumbler I recently bought in an effort to not spill things quite so often. (Seriously there is still a two inch red mark on my forehead; it wasn't gross at all trying to clean the straw of the skin cells it scraped off of my face).

A mere hour later (returning from lunch) I dropped something and squatted down to get it. Wouldn't you know it, I managed to hit the back of head on the underside of the desk - so hard in fact that a coworker brought me a small bag of ice to put on the newest injury.

((It might be too much to include here that as soon as I sat back in my chair I hit my ankle on the nearby bookcase, flipping the middle shelf and sending the contents flying... ))

My clumsiness is probably hereditary (yes, if you must know, I googled it). My father is a smooth talker but ummm, he can't exactly walk the walk (sorry Daddy!). For real tho, the man has had way more creative injuries than I can attempt to count. And my son... well, for now we'll just say he's an active little boy and accidents are expected.

I've been following in my father's stumbling footsteps for quite a while now, now that I think about it. Back in middle school I was playing second base for my softball team when a grounder hit a rock, popped up and hit me in the face - giving me two black eyes, a broken nose and leaving the imprint of the ball's stitches on my chin. (My dad and stepmom made me go to school the next day - thanks a lot!)

Before that, I was climbing on my cousin's back trying to reach the pears in our neighbor's tree when i fell and fractured my arm - on my cousin's face. Side note: while my arm was still in a sling, I further injured it by using it to jumprope (because that's perfectly logical).

Oh, oh, oh! There was also the time I was plugging in my laptop and then backed into the corner of the counter, causing a stream of blood to flow from my lower back right down into my... well, I'm sure you can figure it out (it rhymes with back). And once, I dropped a chopstick that stabbed me between the toes, making me trip and hit my head on the nearby doorframe. (All this while perfectly sober, mind you.)

My typical response is to laugh - I think I've actually forgotten how to cry about pain. Usually there are only tears after I've giggled so hard I can't breath (and yes, if you fall, I'll laugh then too). Is this a normal or healthy reaction? Hell if I know. Maybe I'm a freak - my mother tells me that I never cried about shots as a baby/kid. I tend to respond that way to emotional pain too - it's inappropriate, maybe, but it's me.

Which brings to me to my point. We're all unique individuals - none of us are good at everything (such as walking without causing bodily harm) but all of us are good at something. When you're the one that's successful, how about being generous and kind to those who are struggling in that area instead of being prideful and harsh?

Hmmmm, let me put it like this: If you're gracefull (sic), share the wealth and show some grace to those who aren't.

***Because if you don't, sure enough, you can count on karma to trip your selfish ass... ;)***



Please Sit on the Fence; It Has the Best View

I'm pretty good about seeing (and sympathizing) with both sides of any story. It's been both a blessing and a curse... because it usually happens even in my own personal situations when it would be pretty convenient to focus only on my side of things.

It's just a part of my Aquarian nature. [I know there are arguments now that we've all been labeled under the wrong sign, but let me assure you that no matter where and how the stars lined up on the day I was born, I am the epitome of an Aquarius - and proud of it, as any true Aquarian would be ;)]

My whole life I have heard the term "on the fence" used with a negative connotation. It means a person is weak and indecisive; it means that one is a slimy coward who has commitment issues.

Well, I beg to differ. You're not a coward for being on the fence - a coward would be afraid of heights! Sitting on the fence doesn't necessarily mean that you're taking the easy route, too lazy to make a decision. Being on the fence is hard work and often uncomfortable.  But it's worth it because the truth is when you're on the fence, you have the best vantage point of the situation. (It's also akin to that other popular phrase "taking the high road," wouldn't you agree?)


The cliche actually just means you're in a neutral position, which I translate to mean peaceful. It means you don't see the world strictly black and white, but recognize all the different colors and even the vast variations of those colors. It means that being human - flawed but compassionate and understanding and kind - is more important to you than being "right."

Anyone can throw a tantrum on nice solid ground - kicking and screaming and shaking fists all to make a point. But doing that while sitting a on fence? I don't think so. Sitting on the fence requires balance, my friend. Balance. And isn't that something we all aim for in this life?

So I entice you: Sit on the fence, please. Enjoy the view.

Kind of Nice

How you treat other people is more about who YOU are and less about the other people.
I'm sure I'm not the first person to say that, but I've realized it's pretty freakin' true.

It's obviously not good to be mean to others, so I want to focus on the difference in being nice and being kind. I mean, nice people are cool... they're polite, they tolerate others, they're... nice. But kindness surpasses niceness.

Forgive me, I've been too lazy (or, ahem, reallllly busy) to do the in-depth research about the root of the word "kind", but it seems like it is somehow related to words like "kin, kindred" etc. That's how I got my little epiphany.

When you are kind to someone, you are saying "I recognize we are kindred, we are related, we are of the same kind." It's looking beyond age, gender, race, sexual orientation and every other possible difference and acknowledging that we are all connected.

When I looked up "kind" in the thesaurus, "nice" wasn't even listed as a synonym! Niceness may tolerate you, but kindness accepts you... loves you because you are family.

Kindness is putting namaste into action. 

Using the Right Kind of Light

The dark can be scary and intimidating. Especially if you're alone. (Then again, maybe it's worse if you're NOT alone... I mean, who wants to be left in the dark with a serial killer??)

Anyway, if you're the one in the dark, it's a big relief for someone to shed some light. The thing is, depending on where you are and what you're doing, the type of light matters significantly. Sometimes plugging in a little night-light is the perfect solution. It brightens the room a bit so you don't have to worry so much about the unknown, but doesn't keep you from resting.

Sometimes a flashlight is the right tool - it lets you see your path without disturbing someone else. And if you feel the need to alert others of what you see, flip the light switch and illuminate the whole room.

Now, there are occasions that demand a spotlight, but those times are sparse - and it's almost NEVER  a good idea to throw a spotlight on someone who's been in the dark. It can be downright cruel. His/her eyes won't have time to adjust... a light so intense won't help him/her, but will only cause pain and panic.
(Really, think about it. What's the first thing a person does when a bright light is suddenly thrown on his face? CLOSES his eyes - now, who does that help? ... And how often does someone flinch when a candle is lit?)

The other thing about putting a spotlight on someone? It leaves YOU in the dark.

Yup, this is all a big metaphor. I like to assume you get it, but just for the record: Don't push so hard for someone else to see things the way you do. Even if you are doing it out of genuine concern... because if you DO sincerely care, you'll want to take the more effective approach. Usually that means "little by little" and not "a lot at once."